lick the carpet

Software engineers used to sit where my colleagues and I do now. They held true to their stereotype and walked around without shoes on, which in our minds makes the surrounding carpet gross and the ultimate payment for a bet/deal/proposal, etc. The comment is always "I will if you lick the carpet." Of course nobody has done this. But that could soon be changing...

I work with clients in the northeast. My colleague that sits by me works with clients in the southeast. Two very different cultures. The other day a prospective partner from New York told me he was very excited about our product and was going to "Sell the balls out of it." We obviously had to put this phrase to good use and form a carpet lick contract. So on the day that my colleague says "sell the balls out of this product" to a client on the phone, yours truly will be quickly licking some nasty, under-cleaned carpet.